Agent ShawneeThe Secret Life of a Shawnee

With the humorous Girlfriend iPhone app (and possibly the answer to life, even at $0.99), all of these problems are solved. Here is a user testimonial to prove our point:

“My first three wives divorced me because I always forgot anniversaries. I am pretty sure my fourth marriage will work thanks to the Girlfriend app?” Mark, 22

This application allows you to set up automated text messages or emails to be sent to your significant other based on your specified criteria such as “Relationship Seriousness” and how often you would like to (or are expected to) communicate. Messages will be sent based on your criteria (every two hours to once a month) and will be randomly generated and sent based on your relationship seriousness level. Messages will possibly be humorous but never vulgar. Out database contains thousands of messages, enabling messages to constantly be fresh and original and signed with your name. Our system enables your significant other to respond to the message and the response will be sent to your email address.

In addition, we have an “Advanced Settings” feature, which enables you to enter relationship and personal information such as anniversary dates, birthdays, and even eye color. This way, you will never miss another date and your messages will be very specific. Example texts are shown below:

“I just drove by a brown barn and it reminded me of your eyes.”

“Did you know we started dating 37 days and 8 hours ago?”

There is a history feature as well, which lets you see what messages have been sent to your significant other and when so you are not thrown off guard if they come up in casual conversation.

In conclusion, forget male enhancement and steroids, all you really need is the Girlfriend iPhone app and your relationship health and sexual activity will increase significantly!